prelaunchX Invitation

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Don’t give up on love.

Boys was chatting with girlfriend.

Boy : hi.

Girl : hi was up?

Boy : I’m texting to the most beautiful girl of the world.

Girl : aww, so sweet of you.

Boy : but she’s not replying. So I’m texting you…..

If you want something which you never had before.

Then do something which you have never done before.           :- Martin Luther

Don’t  give up on love.

Because –

There is always someone who loves you.

Even if its not the person you were hopping for….

Funny line for Advice : -

Always learn from the mistake of others. Who had taken your advice…

Girl : its not that I want you with me everytime. But just I don’t  want anyone else to have you for a second.

Boy : aaye haye teri English….

Shayari likhna unka kaam nahin,

Jo dil me basa kerte hain.

Shayari wo shakhs likha kerte hain,

Jo kalam se nasha kerte hain….

Santa : nevi me job nikali hai, karoge?

Banta : haa-haa , per kaam kya karna hai?

Santa : jab jahaz bich samunder me ruk jaaye, to pichhe se dhakka lagana hoga…..

Teacher : nalayak, din bhar ladkiyon ke sath itni baatein kyon kerte ho?

Boy : sir, me garib hun. Mere paas blackberry messenger nahin hai….

Yaar se pyaar ko basaya jata hai,

Pyaar se pyaar ko hasaya jata hai,

Pyaar to wo dawa hai mere dost,

Jisse kanch ko bhi Kohinoor banaya jata hai…

Teri yaadon ki mehfil bikharti nahin,

Tujh bin ye zindgi sawanrti nahin,

Har waqt aasani se gujar jata hai,

Per ye tanha raatein gujarti nahin….

Dil se dua deta hun,

Khuda tere dil ko yun nabad naa kare,

Me to sah gaya sitam tere ae-jaan,

Tere dil ko koi yun barbad naa kare…..

Radha : “aapne mujhse prem kiya, per shadi rukmani se kyon?”

Krishna : “Radhe, shadi me do log chahiye, aur hum to ek hi to hai.”

Santa raat ko smoking karna chahta tha. Per use kahin per bhi machis nahin mili. Bechara niras hokar mombatti ko bujha kar so gaya….

What is extreme height of honesty?

Sitting in an exam hall,

Opening a chit memorizing it,

Then-

Writing without looking to it…

Dil me khuda hai,

Aankhon me nasha hai,

Baton me maza hai,

Chahat me ada hai,

Andaz bhi juda hai,

Dosti me wafa hai,

Are yaar isiliye sab hum per fida hai…..

Santa : have you heard of Suez canal?

Banta : yes.

Santa : my papaji dug it.

Banta : have you heard of dead sea?

Santa : yes.

Banta : my dadaji killed it….

When someone says , “ I like your shirt.”

I look down to see , what I’m wearing….

Pyaar me mila har gham uphar hota hai,

Pyaar wo hota hai, jisme intezaar hota hai,

Sadiyon tak intezaar kerte hain wo,

Jinko apne pyaar per aitbaar hota hai…

Life may be Hard, not be always Fun.

When night brings dark, morning brings Sun.

When life seems tough, and-

Nobody seems to care ,

Dil se yaad karna,

I’ll be always there…..

Kal ek tuta tara dekh kar maine dua mangi,

Ki mere dost ko sms karne ki sakti de,

Achanak dekha –

Ki tara wapas aasman me jud gaya,

Aur bola –

‘Impossible’ wo kanjus hai…

Pyaar to zindgi ka afsana hai,

Ishq ka apna hi ek tarana hai,

Pata hai sabko milenge aansu,

Per naa jane is duniya me kaun kiska Deewana hai…..

Only 2 kind of people will say Money cann’t  buy Happiness. : -

1)Those who have no money. And –

2)Those who have too much money….

Kitna jaanta hoga wo shakhs mere bare me,

Aye dost –

Mere muskurane per jisne puchh liya kit um udaas kyon ho….

Cute lines by true relation : -

My love will be in my heart & not in my words.

My anger will be in my words & not in my heart.

Santa : agar biwi ke baap ko sasur kehte hain, to girlfriend ke baap ko kya kahenge?

Banta : agar shadi ke liye haan keh de to sasur. Nahin to asur…

Har waqt muskurana fitarat hai humari,

Aap yun hi khush rahein hasrat hai humari,

Aap ko hum yaad aaye ya naa aaye,

Aapko yaad karna aadat hai humari….

Orange ka juice,

Mera dost kanjus.

Aam ka achar,

Hamesha bahane taiyar.

Ice-cream ka cone,

Naa kare kabhi phone.

Bahane hain easy,

Kehte hain ‘I’m Busy.’

Bhige mausam ki bhigi si sham,

Bhigi si yaad,

Bhuli hui baat,

Bhula hua waqt,

Wo bita hua sath,

Mubarak ho aapko 2012 ki pehli barshat…..

Train me warning likhi thi –

‘bina ticket wale yatri hoshiyar’.

Santa : wah! Aur jo ticket lekar yatra kar rahe hain, wo sab gadhe hai kya?...

People often feel something but express something else.

They mean something but say something else.

So learn the art of saying nothing in such a way that it leaves nothing unsaid….

A sardar had a child after 3 month of marriage.

He asked his wife ye 3 month ke baad bachcha kaise hua?

Wife replied : tumhari shadi ko kitna arsa hua?

Sardar : 3 months.

Wife : aur meri shadi ko?

Sardar : 3 months.

Wife : aur bachche kitne month ke baad?

Sardar : 3 month.

Wife : total kitne hue?

Sardar : oye 9 months & start dance balle balle…

Silsile to yunhi chalet rahenge,

Faasle hain aur badhte rahenge,

Lekin aapka ye dost aapko har pal yaad karta rahega….

If you don’t  want someone to play with your feelings.

Then stop depending your life. And –

Expectations on that person…

Everyone has to admit that the most depressing moment is when you wake up early and realize that you only  have 5 minutes of sleep left…

Being your friend is my gift.

Missing you is my bad luck.

Disturbing you with SMS is my way of thinking you.

But –

Keeping our friendship is my aim…

Now, birds are silent.

Butterflies are hanging.

Sun is sleeping.

Moon is watching you.

Sshhhhhhhh.

Its time to sleep.

Close your eyes.

Sweet dreams.

Good night…

Santa’s son was filling a form.

Son : papa, mother tongue me kya likhu?

Santa : likh de,  very long and uncontrollable…

Gham naa kar, zindgi bahut hai;

Chahat ki mehfil tere liye saji hai,

Bas 1 bar muskurakar toh dekh,

Taqdeer khud thujhse milne bahar khadi hai….

Open your tinky minky eyes,

Stand up and stretch your crunchy prunchy bonz,

And then wake up yourself,

Tell your brain to refresh ,

And tell yourself todays is GOOD DAY…..

Yaad aati hai to jara kho lete hain.

Aansu aankho se utar aaya to ro lete hain.

Neend to nahin aati aankho me lekin –

Aap sapno me aayenge is liye so lete hain.

Good Night…

Today is year’s middle day.

We have completed 183 day and still we have 183 days.

So have –

“A HAPPY HALF YEAR”

Hope I am the only one to wish you on this unique day…..

Smile is a cooling system of heart,

Sparking system of eyes,

Lighting system of face,

Relaxing system of mind,

So –

Activate your all systems & keep smiling…..

Jo kehti thi kabhi –

Tujhe dil me lock kar diya.

Aaj usi ne facebook per block kar diya….

Hum apni zindgi me har kisi ko ehmiyat isliye dete hain,

Taqi –

Jo achche honge , wo saath denge.

Aur –

Jo bure honge, wo sabak denge….

Kaash tum chand aur me sitara hota,

Aasmaan me ek aashiyana humara hota,

Log tumhen door se dekhte,

Nazdik se dekhne ka haq sirf humara hota….

Sawan ne bhi kisi se pyaar kiya tha,

Usne use badal ka naam diya tha,

Rote the ek dusre ki judai me,

Aur –

Logon ne use barish ka naam diya tha……

No one is  pure and perfect in this world.

If you avoid people for their mistakes.

You will always be alone in this world.

So judge less & love more……

Naa hum rahe dil lagane ke kabil,

Naa dil raha ghum uthane ke kabil,

Laga uski yaadon ke jo zakhm dil per,

Naa chhoda usne muskurane ke kabil…

Zindgi ki kitab me har din ek panne ke saman hai,

Agar hum chahe toh un panno ko ulatne ke bajaye,

Usme se kuchh to seekh hi sakte hain…..

The best attractive lines by someone about  true Love. ------

Jo dil ke aaine me ho wo hi pyaar ke kabil hai.

Warna diwar ke kabil to har tasveer hua karti hai….

Just a Movement is not a Life,

But –

Every Movement is a turning point of your Life.

Think slowly.

You will get actual meaning of Life…

The 3 important C’s of Life : -

1)      Choices,

2)      Chances , and

3)      Changes.

Make a Choice to take a Chance.

Then your Life will Change….

Doctor  : aapke 3 danth kaise toot gaye?

Santa : wife ne kadak halwa banayi thi. Wo khaya isliye.

Doctor : halwa khane se mana kar dete.

Santa : fir 32 ke 32 tutte….

Never search a person whom you want.

Search a person who wants you.

Don’t  care for those who ignore you.

Care for those who are ignoring others for you…..

New day, new blessing.

Don’t  let yesterdays failures.

Ruin the beauty of today.

Because –

Each day has its own promise of love, joy, forgiveness…

Good Morning…

Door ho kar bhi paas ho tum, Meri saanso me basa ehsaas ho tum,

Door ho kar bhi paas ho tum,

Meri saanso me basa ehsaas ho tum,

Tumko  ehsaas ho naa ho,

Per mere liye behad khaas ho tum….

Time and Smile are two critical things in Life.

Sometimes Time makes you forget –

“How to Smile.”

And –

Sometimes someone’s Smile makes us forget Time…

Never go out of your way to explain someone your Honesty & their Faults.

Because –

Time has it’s own way of Revealing the Truth…

If 100% of People love you,

Make sure I am one of them,

If 99% People hate you,

Make sure I am in that  1%  who loves you,

If 100% of People hate you,

Then make sure I am no more…

A bed of clouds for you to sleep,

Diamond stars as your bedside lamp,

Angels from heaven singing lullabies for you,

May you sleep Peacefully through out the Night.

Good Night…

Santa : 1 chor ne mujhe loot liya.

Banta : tere paas to hamesha Gun hoti hai.

Santa : haan 2 lakh ki hai. Maine chhupa lit hi. Warna wo bhi le jata .

Slam book : -

Name :

Pet Name :

D.O.B. :

Best Movies :

Fav song :

Fav Colour :

Fav  Friend :

Enemy :

Fav Food :

Fav TV Program :

Fav Hero :

Fav Heroin :

Fav Animal :

Fav Place :

Fav Game :

Fav Player :

I am Your :

Life is :

I want to see my own funeral,

I want to see who will be crying,

And –

Who will be there,

But –

More than anything I just want to see who cares…

Ajeeb andaaz hai mere –

Mehboob ki masumiyat ka.

Yaaron,

Me agar tasveer me bhi dekhun to –

Wo palke jhuka leti hai…

A daily thought,

A silent tear,

A constant wish,

That you are near,

Words are few,

But thoughts are deep,

Memories of our friendship…

Ruth gaye humare sab chahne wale,

Ruth gaye hume manane wale,

Ab to mobile bhi humse puchhta hai –

Ki kahan chhup gaye tujhe roz SMS karne wale….

Sanam teri nafrat me wo dam nahin,

Jo meri chahat ko mita de,

Ye mohabbat hai koi khel nahin,

Jo aaj hans ke khela,

Aur kal ro ke bhula de…

Dil ki awaaz ko izhaar kehte hain,

Jhuki nigah ko ikrar kehte hain,

Sirf pane ka naam Ishq nahin,

Kuchh khone ko bhi pyaar kehte hain….

Es dil ka ek arman hai,

1 chand si mehbooba  humari jaan hai,

Jise mehsus kerna to mumkin hai,

Per milna kahan aasan hai,

Kyonki –

Me ek  zameen  aur  wo ek aasman hai…

Khushi ka pal ho tumhare liye,

Baharon ka gulista ho tumhare liye,

Kamyabi ki manzil ho tumhare liye,

Bas ek pyaara sa ehsaas ban kar rehna humare  liye…

Exams should be given on Mobiles instead of sheets.

You know.

Because –

Today students have more typing speed than writing speed…..

Patni : suniyeji, aapka dost galat ladki se shaadi ikar raha hai. Aap use rokte kyon nahin.

Pati : kyon rokun? Us kaminey  ne mujhe roka tha kya?...

Life is so confusing : -

What we want we don’t  get.

What we get we are not satisfied.

What we expect never happens.

And what we hate generally repeats.

That’s Life….

Humare liye unke dil me chahat naa thi,

Kisi khushi me koi dawat naa thi,

Maine dil unke kadmon me rakh diya,

Per zameen per dekhna unki aadat naa thi…

Mother is bank,

Where we deposite all our worries,

The best medicine in the world is –

A Mother’s Kiss.

Happy Mother’s Day…

Ek sharabi ka Court me case chal raha tha.

Judge ne kaha : ‘Order-Order’.

Sharabi replied : ek Chilli Chiken, 1 Royal Stag with Soda jaldi …

Ameer itne bano ki aap kitni bhi keemati cheez ko chaho kharid sako.

Aur –

Keemati itnee bano ki is duniya ka koi ameer bhi aapko kharid naa sake…

Hontho per naa kabhi koi shikwa chahiye,

Bas nigahe karam aur dua chahiye,

Chand taaron ki tamanna mujhko nahin,

Aap salamat raho aur kya chahiye…

Beautiful lines : -

I asked to Life : Why are you so difficult?

Life smiled and said : because never appreciate easy things…

Santa London ke Hotel me Murgi khane gaya.

Lekin Murgi ka English word bhul gaya.

Waiter : what do you like to have sir?

Santa : Egg’s Mother…

Dad to Son : why do you look so upset?

Son : I cann’t  tell you Dad.

Dad : treat me, as your friend.

Son : yaar teri Bhabhi naraz ho gayi hai….

Wada jo kiya hai tod mat dena,

Halat kuchh bhi mujhe chhod mat dena,

Mere paas reh jaye sirf yaadon ke saye,

Pyaar ki kahani ko aisa modmat dena…

Teacher : agar me 2 din ke liye tumhari Maa ban jaun to tujhe sudhar dungi.

Student : Mam me aaj hi jake apne bapu ko batata hun, ‘Bapu teri to Lottery lag gayi’…

Tumhein dil  me basaye rakhta hun,

Aur duniya ko bhulaye rakhta hun,

Tumhe meri nazar naa lag jaaye,

Isliye apni nazar jhukaye rakhta hun…

Never feel bad if people Remember you only in Need.

Feel Proud that you come in their Mind.

Like Candle in Darkness of their lives…..

Apni  asafaltaon ke vicharon per vijay prapt kerna hi sabse badi safalta hai.

Silsile to yun hi chalet rahenge,

Faaslein hain aur badhte rahenge,

Lekin aapka ye dost har pal aapko yaad kerte rahenge….

Arz hai,

Jara gaur farmayiyega,

Uski galiyon me naa rakhenge kadam aaj ke baad,

Gaur farmayiyega,

Wah wah,

Kyonki humari apni gali me hi setting ho gayi hai….

Success never depends on the size of our brain.

It  always depends on our –

POSITIVE-POSITIVE Thoughts & Actions only….

Agar  rashta khubshoorat hai,

Pata kijiye kis manzil tak jati hai,

Lekin agar manzil khubshoorat hai,

To rashte ki perwah mat kijiye,

Chalet rahiye…..

Maine sapno ko door hote dekha hai,

Jo mila nahin use khote dekha hai,

Log kehte hain – ‘Raat ko OSS girti hai’;

Per maine to phoolon ko akele me rote dekha hai….

Har sapne ko apni sanso me rakho,

Har manzil ko apni baahon me rakho,

Jeet zarur milegi aapko,

Bas apne iraade ko apni nigahon me rakho….

Apne bhagwan ko kabhi ye mat batao ki –

Aapki taqlif kitni badi hai,

Apni taqlif ko ye batao ki –

Aapke bhagwan kitna bada hain….

Sometimes words are not enough to express our feelings.

But –

Our loved ones understand our feelings without any words,

That’s the language of hearts…

Small & simple formula for better life : -

Never try to defeat people.

Just try to win them.

Aim in Life should be 654321.

Shocked naa.

6 : six digit salary

5 :  5 days work

4 : 4 wheeler vehicle

3 : 3 room flats

2 : 2 cute children

1 : 1 sweetheart ..

7 tips to be Happy in Life :-

+Never be late

+Don’t  cheat

+Live simple

+Expect little

+Work more

+Always Smile

+Never break

That’s  a good relationship.

Zindgi hasin hai

Zindgi se pyaar karo

Hai abhi raat to subah ka intezaar karo

Vo pal bhi aayega

Jiska intezaar hai aapko

Rab per bharosa aur waqt per aitbaar karo…..

Din ka ujala ho ya raat ki khamoshi

Aapki chahat hume tanha hone nahin deti

Khuda ne diya hume aap jaisa dost

Bas yahi khushi raat bhar hume sone nahin deti…..

Aapki yaad ek anmol phool hai,

Hum aapko bhul jayenge,

Ye aapki bhul hai,

Koi yaad hume naa kare,

Koi gila nahin hume,

Bas apno ko nahin bhulte hum,

Ye humara usul hai….

Zindgi ke kitab ke jo panne hote hain,

Kuchh apne kuchh begane hote hain,

Khushiyon se sawar jaati hai zindgi,

Bas rishte pyaar se nibhane hote hain,

Faqeer : maa ji, bhuka hun. Khuda ke naam pe khana de do.

Maa ji : khana abhi nahin paka.

Faqeer : facebook pe Rahim chacha ke naam se hun, pak jaye to update kar dena….

Santa : oye, ladki dekh aaya? Kaisi hai yaar?

Banta : rang se kali hai, aur kaan se kam sunti hai.

Santa : jara English me batana.

Banta : “Black-Behry” hai…

Dharmik proposal : -

1)      Maa ko Marathi me kyan kehte hain?

2)      Ram ke bade bête ka naam kyat ha?

3)      Swami Narayan ke tilak ka aakar kya hai?

Ans : “I LOVE YOU”……

Time jaise Regular bano,

Rose jaise fresh raho,

Pathar jaise strong bano,

Honey jaise sweet bano,

Muskil hai,

Per try kerne me kya jata hai mere bhai….

Har aasman me sitare nahin hote,

Har samundar ke kinare nahin hote,

Har nazar me iwshare nahin hote,

Har bahar me nazare nahin hote,

Har park me fauware nahin hote,

Har jam ke paimane nahin hote,

Sabhi hasino ke diwane nahin hote,

Har ghum ke fasane nahin hote,

Har Mahatma Sant nahin hota,

Har message ke ant nahin hote,

Ped per lage hain aam jja ke tod lo,

Agar kuchh rah gaya hai to khud jod lo,

Ab gusse se munh naa fulao,

Mentos khao,

Dimag ki batti jalao,

Aur bijli ka bill bachao……

Jo jaldi mile wo hai ghum,

Jo der se mile wo hai paisa,

Jo kisi kisi ko mile wo hai pyaar,

Jo kismet se mile wo hain aap…….

Ladka bola : dilruba.

Ladki boli : pizza khila.

Ladka bola : paisa nahin hai.

Ladki boli : aise nahin.

Ladka bola : mehangayi hai.

Ladki boli : aaj se tu mera bhai hai…..

God says : -

Zindgi me aap kitne khush hain. This is not important.

Zindgi me aapki wajah se kitne log khush hain. This is most important…..

Boy : ‘I LOVE YOU’.

Girl : naa.

Boy :  think again.

Girl : nahin.

Boy : waiter, bill alag-alag lana.

Girl : haan-haan bola naa, ‘I LOVE YOU’….

Samane ho manjil to rashte naa modna.

Jo man ho khwahis naa todna.

Har kadam pe milegi kamyabi tumhe.

Bas sitare chumne ke liye kabhi jamin naa chhodna….

Har subah teri muskurati rahe.

Har sham teri gungunati rahe.

Tu jise bhi mile,

Is tarah mile ki –

Har milne walon ko yaad teri aati rahe…

Girlfriend is Beauty, and Wife is Duty.

Girlfriend is Lovely , and Wife is Pagli.

Girlfriend is Whisky, and Wife is Risky.

Girlfriend is Rani, and Wife is Pareshani.

Girlfriend is Mangofrooti, and Wife is Kismat footi……

Aapko har chand aur sitare mile,

Har kadam per aapko sahara mile,

Life me kabhi akele naa ho aap,

Kuchh hum jaisa dost mile,

Aur kuchh humse bhi pyara mile….

Padosi 1: yaar, tere ghar se roz hasne ki aawaz aati hai. Khushi ka raaz kya hai?

Padosi 2 : meri biwi mujhe jute marti hai. Lag jaye to wo hasti hai. Naa lage to me hasta hun…

Taqdeer likhne wale ek ehsaan kar de,

Mere dost ki zindgi me Muskaan hi Muskaan likh de,

Naa mile kabhi dard usko,

Chahe to uski kismet me uski Wife ka naam ‘Muskaan’ likh de……

Chand taaron ka nor aap pe barse,

Har koi aapki chahat ko tarse,

Aapki zindgi me aaye itni khushiyan, ki –

Aap ek ghum pane ko tarse….

Santa train ki patari per so gaya.

Banta : train aayegi to mar jayega.

Santa : plane upper se gaya. Kuchh nahin hua, to train kya cheez hai?...

Jungle me sapera bin liye baitha.

Jara gaur farmayiyega.

Jungle me sapera bin liye baitha hai.

Saanp aur bhi kameena hai.

Wo durbeen liye baitha hai….

Agar 1 hara hua insane ,

Harne ke baad bhi smile kare;

To jeetane wala apni jeet ki khushi kho deta hai.

That’s the Power of Smile….

So keep smiling….

A mind blowing & heart touching thought of life…

Laash pani per tairati kyon hai?

Kyonki –

Dubane ke liye bhi zindgi chahiye…..

Newton’s 1^st law of Kaminapan. : -

Every kamina continues to do kaminapan until & unless a sandal with a velocity of 9.8m/sec is impressed upon him by a beautiful girl. This force is called ‘Beizzati’ which is directly proportional to Sharmindagi but Awarapan remains constant…..

Barish ki 1 bund apko khushi de,

2 bund hasi de,

3 bund tandurasti de,

4 bund kamyabi de,

5 bund,

Bas naa –

Sardi ho jayegi.

Happy mansoon…..

Failed student ke Papa Teacher se : Mam, thoda aap tight raho; thoda me zor lagata hun. Bhagwan ne chaha to is sal ladka nikal jayega…

Aapkin zindgi me 5 cheezein kabhi bhi aa sakti hain.

Hum

Hamara call

Hamara SMS

Hamari yaad

And –

Hamari yaad se aapke Face per SMILE .

Dekho aa gayi naa….

So keep ur smiling…..

Dur gaon me 1 basti thi.

Jahan murgian sasti thi.

Unki aawaz me itni masti thi.

Jitna maro utna hasti thi.

Aap bhi bahut haste ho.

Usi gaon ke lagate ho….

Chiragon ki roshani jab jara hili.

Laga tumhari ek aahat si mili.

Jaan-e-man,

Jaake dekha jab dar pe,

To phir wahi kafir hawa mili…

Life is the art of drawing without an eraser.

So be careful.

While taking any small decision.

Think About valuable pages of ur  life….

Nafz dekha to bimar likh diya.

Rog dekha to pyaar likh diya.

Shukra guzar hain hum us hakim ke,

Jisne dawa ki jagah unka didar likh diya…

Every woman has 2 major problems whenever she opens her wardrobe. :-

1)nothing to wear. And

2)no place to keep her clothes…

Me mout ke hathon ko chum lunga.

Agar meri ye dua jo Kabul ho.

Ki meri kabar ki jo mitti ho,

Wo meri MAA ke kadmon ki Dhool ho…

What could be the sweetest scene you could ever witness on the Earth?

It is watching your loved one sleeping and murmuring your name…

Rishta humara is jahan me sabse pyaara ho.

Jaise zindgi ko saanso ka sahara ho.

Yaad karna mujhe us pal me.

Jab tum akele ho, aur koi naa tumhara ho….

Gravitation is not responsible for people falling in love.   : - Einstien.

Cute relationship : -

When someone gets angry with you. And

Says : I will never talk to you.

And later comes back to inform you.

 : - ‘I AM STILL ANGRY.’

Dear friend mujhe apne dil me jagah mat dena.

Me to aapke dimag me rehna chahta hun.

Kyonki –

Jagah jitni khali ho, rehne me utna hi maza aata hai….

Santa bijli office phone karke bola : light band kar do.

Bijli wala : why sir?

Santa : wo yar, mere dimag me 1 nayi mast wali gaali aayi hai. Wo tumko deni hai…

Need hope? Call me.

Need advice? Message me.

Need help? E-mail me.

Need money? Sorry the number you have dialed doesn’t  exist please don’t  try later…

Teacher  to kid : how many months in a year?

Kid : 12.

Teacher  : how do you know?

Kid : 12 mahine 12 tarike se teri beti ko pyaar jatata  hun….

Zindgi me 4 baatein jo aapka sath kabhi naa chhodegi. : -

1)      Dil ki dhadkan,

2)      Parchhayi,

3)      Khushiyan, and –

4)      Ek usse rishta,

Jiska aap message padh rahe ho…..

Husband : agar tumhe kuchh ho gaya , to me pagal ho jaunga.

Wife : doosari shadi to nahin karoge naa.

Husband : pagal ka kya hai? Kuchh bhi kar sakta hai…

Santa ne college khola.

Banta : yaar Santa, tu apne college ka naam sabse alag rakhna.

Santa ne college ka naam rakha : ‘SANTA SINGH GIRLS COLLEGE’ only for BOYs……

Kaanton me guzar  deta hai GULAB apni zindgi,

Ae doston –

Kaun kehta hai –

Ki phoolon ko koi ghum nahin hota…..

Teacher : bada ho kar kya banoge?

Student : Pilot.

Teacher  : why?

Student  : upar accident ka khatra nahin hota……

Kabhi-kabhi ye tay karna muskil ho jata hai ki –

‘Wo jhuth jo chehare per muskaan laye.’

Yaa –

‘Wo such jo aankhon me aansu laye.’

If you really want to give someone a gift.

Try giving them your time & attention.

A loving heart doesn’t expect anything more than that…..

Life is like a Camera,

So you should always Smile at every moment.

Kya pata kab kaun aapki Tasvir apne dil me utar le….

Bewafa  se umid-e-bafa naa rakho,

Loot jaoge dil ka darwaja khula naa rakho,

Khwahish hai agar jannat me jane ki –

Maa-baap ko khud se juda naa rakho….

As reflection cannot B seen in Boiling water.

In D same way,

Truth cannot B seen in a State of Anger.

So Analyze B4 U Finalyze……

Those who make you Smile.  : - Thank Them.

Those who makes you cry. : - Tolerate Them.

But those  who makes you Smile when tears are in your Eyes.  : - Trust Them.

Life is really nothing without ‘LOVE’,

Give everyone your ‘LOVE’.

But don’t  expect it back.

Because –

Its not a Deal.

It’s a Feel…..

Toot gaya dil per arman wahi hai.

Door rahte hain.

 Phir  bhi,

Pyaar wahi hai .

Jante  hai,

Ki mil nahin paayenge.

Phir bhi in aankhon me intezaar wahi hai….

Yaaron ke bich yarana sikh gaye,

Thoda sur lagaye aur tarana sikh gaye,

Sab kuchh thik tha zindgi me,

Galat to tab hua jab dil lagana sikh gaye….

Santa : aisi kaun si kali hai, jo kabhi nahin khilti?

Banta : aisi koi kali hi nahin hai, jo khilti naa ho.

Santa : hai.

Banta : kaun si?

Santa : Chip Kali…

Kitni parwah kerte hain hum unki,

Kash unko bhi ehsaas ho jaye,

Kahin aisa naa ho ki –

Wo hosh me tab aaye,

Jab hum gahri neend me so jaye....

If you want to enjoy something, Always think life is long.

If you want to enjoy something,

Always think life is long.

But if you want to achieve  something,

Always think life is very short.

Kahan se laun hunar use manane ka,

Koi jawab nahin tha uske ruth jane ka,

Mohabbat me saza mujhe hi milni thi,

Kyonki –

Jurm maine kiya unse dil lagane ka….

When ambition exceeds performance,

The gap is called Frustration.

But –

When the performance exceeds ambition,

The overlap is called Success…

Wo mile bhi to sirf Khuda ke darwar me,

Aap tum hi batao –

Yaaron,

Hum Ibaadat karte yaa Mohabbat….

Agar log sirf zarurat per aapko yaad karte hain,

To bura mat maniye.

Garv mahsus kijiye,

Kyonki –

‘Aap ek Candle ki tarah tab yaad aate ho,

Jab andhera hota hai’….

Life is flowing like a River,

With unexpected turns.

May be good,

May be bad,

Lear to enjoy each turn,

Because these turns will never Return….

Wo chand jaise aasman me chamakte rahe,

Hum raat bhar unki chamak me khoye rahe,

Jante hain ki kabhi naa paa sakenge unhe,

Phir bhi har dua me unhi ko mangte rahe…

We always feel that –

Life of others is better than us.

But –

We always forget that –

We are also others for someone else..

Live your Life as you Love….

Ladkiyan 2 type ki hoti hain. :-

1)Boring : - jo dhup wale din chhatri leke jati hai.

2)Interesting : - jo barish ke din janbujhkar chhatri ghar bhul jati hai..

Agar kisi ke pyaar ka andaza lagana ho to,

Uski narazgi ek bar dekh lo.

Kyonki –

Jitni siddat se wo narazgi dikhati hai,

Utni hi siddat uske pyaar me hoti hai…

Zindgi me muskilein tamam hai,

Phir bhi en labon per ek Muskaan hai,

Kyonki –

Jeena jab har hal me hai,

To phir Muskurakar jeene me kya Nuksaan hai…

Don’t  mix the words with your Mood,

Because –

You will have many options to change the Mood,

But –

You will never get any option to Replace your Spoken Words….

Teacher  :- samajh tujhe 10 laddu diye.

Boy  :- kab?

Teacher :- samajh naa tere baap ka kya jata hai? Us me se 5 mujhe diye, to tere paas kitne bachein?

Boy :- 20.

Teacher :- kaise?

Boy :- samajh naa tere baap ka kya jata hai….

In life one should take every opportunity to laugh.

Because –

There is always something around the corner.

To make us cry…..

One sided love –

Wo ladka aaj bhi garmi me mar raha hai.

Kisi ladki ne ek bar use kaha tha.—

“Tum es sweater me bahut ache lagte ho.”

A single lovable Smile.

Is a proper key for –

Many solutions & many confusions.

So express your cute Smile every moment…

The person who is your friend will always do 2 things extremely for you. –

Silently caring. And –

Openly hurting to make you perfect…..

A girl can be your –

Best Friend,

A Worst Enemy,

A Cute Sister,

A lovely Sweetheart. Or –

A Real Stupid.

It all depends on how you Treat Her….

Rule of Success : -

Always consult a girl before doing any important task in your life.

.

/

.

And act exactly opposite to her advice….

Only for you –

Always Smile.

Haso.

Jiyo.

Muskurao.

Khush raho.

Ky pata –

Kal mujhse ladai ho jaye, aur –

Aapke paas hasane ke liye daant hi naa rahe.

So Keep SMILING…..

Dil chahta hai ki –

Duniya me jo sabse pyara hai,

Use jaan se maar dun.

Par kya karun –

Suicide karna paap hai…

A Smile costs less than Electricity,

But gives more Light.

So always Smile & prove that –

You are the Best BULB….

Bhool jane ka hosla naa hai naa hoga,

Door reh kar bhi tu juda naa hai naa hoga,

Tujhse milkar kisi aur se kya milna,

Koi tere jaisa naa tha naa hai naa hoga…

Beautiful message by MOTHER TERESA : -

“If you can’t LOVE a Person whom you see; then how can you LOVE GOD whom you have never seen.”

Door ho jaun to intezar karna,

Apne dil me itna to aitbaar karna,

Lout ke aayenge hum agar,

Kabhi chale bhi gaye to,

Aap bas humse ye Dosti barkarar rakhna….

Santa : yar ye bata ki world me kitne desh hain?

Banta : abe kal ke dushman duniya me ek hi desh hai – INDIA aur baki sab Videsh hain…..

Ek phool ki tamanna thi ki,

Kaash wo daal jhuk jati to kyat ha,

Zindgi ke mod pe jab wo sath thi meri,

Kaash zindgi wahin ruk jati to jya tha….

Patient : Dr. sahab ye Phoolon ki mala kis ke liye?

Doctor : ye mera 1^st  Operation hai. Success hua to mere liye, nahin to tumhare liye…

Life is sin90, that is ONE.

Love is cos90, that is ZERO,

But –

Friendship is tan90, that is INFINITY.

Friendship never Ends…

Sharing Pain will reduce it.

Sharing Happiness will increase it.

So Pain or Gain share it.

Especially with the One who Cares for you…

Duniya jise kehta hai –

Jadu ka khilona hai.

Mil jaye to Mitti hai.

Kho jaye to Sona hai.

Barsat ka badal to diwana hai.

Kya jane kis rah se bachna hai.

Kis kis chat ko bhigona hai..

Arjun ne Krishna se puchha : Rishton ka asli matlab kya hota hai?

Krishna ne hans kar jawab diye : jo matlab ke liye banaya jaye wo Rishta hi kahan hota hai…

Pappu : Uncle, Bablu ghar per hai?

Santa : Hai Beta. Maggi kha raha hai, tujhe bhookh lagi hai?

Pappu : han.

Santa : to tub hi ghar se kha kar aa….

Kabhi chup bhi reh kar dekho,

Kabhi aanshu bhi piker dekho,

Roshni nahin hamesha sath rehti,

Kabhi andheron ko humsafar bhi banakar dekho….

Evergreen thought : -

“This moment is not Permanent in Life.”

-          Read the above line whenever You are in Happy or Sad. It works Honestly.

Rose is famous for Grace.

Advocate is famous for Case.

Horses are famous for Race.

But –

Smile is Famous on your Face.

So keep Smiling…

Half of the Problems in Life are.

Because –

We Act without Thinking.

And –

The Rest Half is… Because –

We keep on Thinking without Acting….

Value of Relation –

Is not that how much you feel happy with some one.

But it is that –

How much someone Feels ALONE without You….

10 years before People used to wake up, and –

1^st see Gods Image .

But –

Now a days People Wake up and –

1^st see how many Messages & Missed Calls are there ….

Santa sarab piker Sadhu se takra gaya.

Sadhu gusse me : aye murkh me tujhe SHRAAP deta hun.

Santa : rukiye Maharaj me Glass leke aata hun…

Tassvur tera jo mujhe chhu jaye,

Meri har sans se teri hi khushboo aye,

Ye kis mod per le aayi hai teri justju,

Pani me aks mera ho aur Nazar tu aaye…..

Bewafa se pyaar nahin hota,

Marne ke baad intezaar nahin hota,

Dosti dekhkar karna mere dost,

Har dost humari tarah wafadaar nahin hota…

Friendship is like Wine,

It gets Better as it grows Older.

Just like us.

I get Better you

Get Older

HAPPY FRIENDSHIP DAY…

Santa platform ke side leta tha.

Banta : kya kar rahe ho?

Santa : suicide.

Banta : to beech me let jao.

Santa : dar lagta hai….

Mushkile dil ke irade aazmayegi,

Nigahon se khwabo ke parde hatayegi,

Gir kar kabhi himmat mat harna,

Yahi thokar tumhe Zindgi me chalna sikhayegi….

Husband : aaj kisi ne mere Baap ko gaali di.

Wife :  fir?

Husband : maine bhi uske baap ko gaali di.

Wife : lekin wo tha koun?

Husband : wo thi mere son ki Mother….

Kya pata kabhi uske zubaan se bhi izhar nikale,

Kya pata kabhi unke dil se bhi pyaar mile,

Sach hai unke bina kabhi  jee nahin sakte,

Kya pata kabhi unke dil se bhi yahi baat nikale….

Santa : mujhe to aankhein band karne per bhi dikhayi deta hai.

Banta : kya dikhta hai?

Santa :  Andhera….

Gham naa ho wahan, jahan ho fasana tera;

Khushiyan dhundti rahe aashiyana tera,

Wo waqt hi naa aaye jab tum udaas ho,

Hamesha kaayam rahe Muskurana tera…

Banta : kya hua, ye mitti kyon khod rahe ho?

Santa : dadaji ne bola, maine unka naam mitti me mila diya hai. Wahi dhund raha hun…

Kabhi to aisa hota hai,

Yaadon ka asar zara der se hota hai,

Aap sochte hain ki hum bhul gaye,

Per humari to har baat me zikar aapka hota hai…

Santa : angrejon ne Chaand ke upper Pani aur Baraf ki khoj kar li hai.

Banta : matlab hume ab sirf Daaru aur Namkeen leke jana hai…

Dekhiye fir raat aa gayi,

Tanhaayiyon me waqt ki baat aa gayi,

Hum to wahin baithe the sitaron ki panah me,

Aankhein band ki to aapki yaad aa gayi…

Is zamane me aise bhi nadan hote hain,

Apni kasti le jaate hain wahan,

Jahan toofan hote hain,

Kyon basate ho unko dil me,

Jo dil ki basti me chand dino ke mehman hote hain….

A sweet note to my irritated friend :

I know that I irritate you more and more every day.

But the day I will be Silent it will irritate you the most….

Santa : soch raha hun ki USA ghum aaun, kitna paisa lagega?

Banta : kuchh bhi nahin.

Santa : kaise?

Banta : sochne ke liye paise nahin lagate…

Once you start a working on something,

Don’t  be afraid of failure, and

Don’t  abandon it.

People who work sincerely are the happiest…

Teri ek dua ke samane wo duaein nakam rehti hai,

Ae dilruba,

Warna –

Meri mout ki dua karne wale to bahut hain..

It takes a strong heart to love.

It takes a stronger heart to continue

To love after it has been hurt…

Kismat ruth gayi,

Dil ke taar tut gaye,

Wo bhi ruth gaye,

Sapane bhi tut gaye,

Khajane me the sirf 2 aanshu,

Jab aapki yaad aayi to wo bhi lut gaye….

Tu ek munfarid phool thi,

Jo dil ko bha gayi.

Warna me wo bhauran nahin,

Jo har gul per fida ho jaun…

Kaamyabi tak pahunchane wale raste sidhe nahin hote,

Lekin –

Ye pakka hota hai, ki –

Kaamyabi milne ke baad saare raste sidhe ho jate hain…

Raaston ki virani, aur –

Jalti dhoop se darne wale,

Kabhi  manzil tak nahin pahunch paate.

Don’t  follow others,

But –

Make others to follow you…

Hum se khelti rahi duniya,

Taas ke patton ki tarah,

Jis ne jita usne bhi phenka,

Jis ne hara usne ne bhi phenka…

Night is not only for sleep,

Its  to forget today’s sorrow,

To dream today’s joyness, and

To receive tomorrow happenings.

HAPPY END OF THE DAY….

Aaj phir aaina puchhta hai,

Ki teri aankhon me nami kyon hai,

Jiski chahat me khud ko bhula diya,

Phir uski chahat me kami kyon hai….

Asman mil jaye to zamin mat chhodna,

Chaand mil jaye to sitare mat todna,

Badi duaaon ke baad mile ho aap dost,

Koi aur mil jaye to hume mat chhodna…

Zindgi ghumon ka ek parinda hai,

Khushiyan aaj kal chuninda hai,

Kabhi yaad kar liya karo hume bhi doston,

Hum bure hi sahi magar abhi zinda hain…

I can go days without talking to you,

Months without seeing you,

But not a second goes by that,

I don’t think about you…

Agar hota yaqeen ki –

Tu milne aayegi khwaab me,

Wafa ki kasam –

Aankhon me Gulaab ki pattiyan saja ke sote….

Door ho jaun to zara intezar karna,

Apne dil me itna to aitbar rakhna,

Lout ke aayenge hum,

Agar kahin chale bhi gaye to,

Aap bas humse ye dosti barkarar rakhna….

See how beautifully God has added one more day in your life.

Not necessarily because –

You need it.

But because –

Someone else might need you….

Students 1^st law of tension –

Pressure on brain is inversely proportional to the no. of days left from “EZM” , where “KAL SE PADHUNGA” remains constant …

Biggest truth –

You can calculate everything,

Even the speed of light.

But –

Can’t  calculate the hate of the people behind their Smile….

Bhoolna aapko naa aasan hoga,

Jo bhule aapko wo nadan hoga,

Aap to basate ho ruh me humari,

Aap hume naa bhule ye aapka ehsaan hoga…

Mayus hona ek gunah hota hai,

Milta wahi hai –

Jo kismet ki lakiron me likha hota hai,

Har chiz mile hume,

Ye jaruri to nahin,

Kuchh chizon ke pane ke intezaar  me hi maza hota hai…

Dil ne hume diwana bana diya,

Roye naa the hum kabhi,

Aapne rula diya,

Humne har waqt yaad kiya aapko,

Lekin –

Aapne yaad karne me zamana laga diya…

Types of proposals :-

1)      I love you.

2)      I want to spend my rest of life with you.

3)      Will you marry me?

But latest one now –

Wanna be my chammak challo….

Log kehte hain –

Kaash padhai pyaar ki tarah hoti,

Apne aap ho jati,

Hum kehte hain ki-

Kaash pyaar padhai ki tarah hota,

Parents maar-maar ke karwate….

Lamho ki ek kitab hai zindgi,

Saanso aur khayalo ka hisab hai zindgi,

Kuchh zarurate puri,

Kuchh khwahisein adhuri,

Bas inhi sawalon ka zawab hai zindgi…

Santa ne Banta ki beti ka rishta manga.

Banta ne Santa ko khub mara.

Maar khake Santa utha.

Kapade zaad ke bola : toh phir me aapka inkar samajhun…

Usne humse puchha : pyaar ka asli matlab kya hota hai?

Tabhi humne hans bola : jo matlab ke liye kiya jaye, wo pyaar nahin hota…

Cute –lines :-

When our absence doesn’t  change someone’s life.

Then accept the reality.

That our presence has no meaning in their life…

The janaza of aashiq

 is nikla from the gali of mehbuba with very zor-shor,

the mehbuba jhaanki from the door

and boli : mar gaya haramkhor…

to impress his girlfriend to Italian Restaurant –

he picked up menu & ordered –

one Giuspe Spomdalchi.

Waiter : sorry sir, that’s the owner….

As the day turns into night,

Keep your worries out of sight,

Close your eyes,

And go to sleep,

All the good times are yours to keep.

Good night & sweet dreams…

Aap ko miss karna humari hobby,

Aapka khayal rakhna meri job,

Aapko khush rakhna mera dream,

Aapke liye dua karna meri duty,

And –

Aapko tang karna mera pyaar…..

Kitni masoom si ye saza hoti hai,

Palat ke dekho to sirf hawa hoti hai,

Nadan hain wo,

Jo chahate hain kisi ko zindgi ki tarah,

Bhool jate hain ki –

Zindgi bhi to webafa hoti hai…

Effect of cold –

Sir se leke paav tak kapade,

Hathon me dastane,

Aur dupatta kandhon per,

Wah wah

Its proof –

Sardi ke din,

Ladkiyon ko tamizdar bana deti hai….

If you doubt our friendship,

Just take 1 coin & toss.

If it is head,

You are my friend.

If it is tail,

I’m your friend….

Santa : bhai jaldi jao, tumhare ghar me barsaat ka pani ghush gaya hai.

Banta : chal jhute, ghar ki chabhi to mere paas hai….

Santa fouj me bharti hua.

2 days baad jung suru ho gayi.

Santa ki topi per goli lagi.

Santa ne hathiyar phenk kar bola : -

Aqalmand ke liye ishara kafi hai…

Judge : tumne ye car chori ki hai?

Chor : janab, car qabristan me khadi thi. Me samajha ki is ke malik ka intekaal ho gaya hai. Me wahan se le aaya…

aap ki ada hume naasur karti hai,

per aapki yaad hume aapko yaad karne ko mazbur karti hai

hum bhool jana chahte hain aapko,

per aapki wo daant hume aapko bhoolne nahin deti...

hum to pyaar aapko karte hain bahoot,

per aapki wo baat hume I LOVE YOU kaizhaar karne nahin deti....

itni si naadan khata hai humari,

ab to maaf kijiye,

naa ho sake to -

kuchh to ab insaaf kijiye.......