Nas Nas me uska Pyaar behta hai.

Nas nas me uska pyaar behta hai,

Har pal khayalon me uska chehara rehta hai,

Meri dua le aayegi use paas mere,

Mera har gira ek aansoo yahi kehta hai…….

Santa : I saw my wife going to Movie with Watchman.

Friend : didn’t  you follow them?

Santa : no yaar, I have already seen that  movie……

Life doesn’t make you or break you,

Its your own mentality that decides this,

So –

Never hesitate and,

Never feel low,

Wear a smile and-

Steal the show……

Beti : Papa, kal aapke ghar se 1 member kam ho jaayega.

Next day Santa ki Beti bhag gayi.

Santa : ladki ne kam to galat kiya, per thi wo Jyotish……

We never know that –

Tomorrow holds, but –

Don’t  be afraid or doubt anything, because –

The one who took care of you Today,

Holds your Tomorrow also…….

Mere dil me pyaar ki pyaas rehne do,

In nigaahon me teri aas rehne do,

Tum ne sab kuchh to mujhse chheen liya hai,

Bas tumhari kuchh yaad paas rehne do…..

Wife (gusse me) : dekh lena tumhe narak me bhi jagah nahin milegi.

Santa : are thik hai; waise bhi me har jagah tere sath aana bhi nahin chahta…..

Santa & Banta 8^th me aathvi bar fail ho gaye.

Santa : chal suicide kar le.

Banta : saale mad ho gaya hai. Agle janam fir Nursery to hi suru karna padega……

Aankhon me basa Sapna to bas Sapna raha,

Koi naa ab is duniya me apna  raha ,

Sabki khushiyon ke liye dua karta raha,

Aur –

Mere naseeb me sirf tadpana raha…….

True lines : -

In life we love & care some people more than others.

But –

Sometimes they prove –

We have only a Guest role in their life…….

Mantriji to Santa : sardar ji dhyan rakhiyega, Me khada hun.

Santa : oh jee khade kyun ho? Baith jao, apna hi ghar hai…

Waqt dar waqt ek ehsas rekhna,

Lamha har lamha ye aas rekhna,

Bhula naa sakenge hum kabhi aapko,        

Lekin aap bhi humari yaadein apne paas rekhna…….

 Love and Death are two uninvited Guests.

Nobody knows their arrival , but –

Both have same impact.

One takes heart and-        

The other takes its Beat……

1

Year

Ke

12

Month

1

Month

Ke

4

Week

1

Week

Ke

7

Days

1

Day

Ke

24

Hours

1

Hour

Ke

60

Minute

1

Minute

Ke

60

Seconds

1

Seconds

Ke

Hazar

Lamhe

Har

Lamhe

Mein

1

Hi

Kaam

Hai

-

“ I MISS YOU. “

If you want to be happy for a short time –

Get drunk.

If you want to be happy for a long time –

Fall in Love.

But if you want to be happy forever –

Don’t  even think of these two…..

Life me 2 baatein hamesha yaad rekhna, -

1)      Jab hum per paani girta hai, to hum bhig jaatein hain.

2)      Nahin girta hai, to nahin bhigtein hain….

Nayi si subah,

Naya sa savera,

Suraj ki kirno me hawaon ka basera,

Khule asma me suraj ka chehra,

Mubarak ho aapko ye Khubsurat Savera. Gmorning.

Zindegi ajib hoti hai,

Kabhi haar kabhi jeet hoti hai,

Tamanna rakho –

Samander ki gehrai ko chhune ki,

Kinaron per to bas zindegi ki suruat hoti hai……

Rango tum , rangu me,

Rangde sara ye jahan,

Bas hasein aur gale lagein,

Aur bhoolendusmani ka nishan.

Holi Mubarak ho….. Happy Holi…

Bright colors,

Water balloons,

Lavish gujiyas & melodious

Songs are the ingredients of perfect Holi.

Wish you and your family a very happy & colourful Holi….

Agar aap mujhe SMS nahin karoge to 4 days baad aap –

Lal, pile, hare, nile ho jaoge?

Ghabarao nahin,

4 days baad HOLI hai.

I wishing you a Happy HOLI…

Kuchh to duniya dari rakho,

Kuchh to dosti yaari rakho,

Baat to aap karte nahin,

SMS hi jaari rakho,

Jab SMS bhi nahin karna to –

Mobile Aalmari me rakho…..

Har taraf khamoshi ka saya hai,

Zindgi me pyaar kisne paya hai,

Hum yaadon me jhumte hain; aur –

Log kehte hain –

Dekho aaj phir drink karke aaya hai…….

Satisfy the person who expext  a Smile from you,

And –

Surprise the person who never expected anything from you…..

Kehte hain tumse hum ye sanam,

Tumhe jab mile khushi aur gham,

Khushi chahe rakhna tum apne hi sang,

Magar baant lena humse apne gham…..

Sath roti thi, hasa kerti thi;

Ek pari mere dil me basa kerti thi,

Kismet thi hum juda ho gaye,

Warna –                                                

Wo mujhe apna taqdir kaha kerti thi……

Kabhi raat me tare gin kar dekho,

Jitney tum gin paoge,

Utna tum mujhe yaad kerte ho,

And –

Jitney baaki reh jaayenge,

Utna hum tumhe yaad kerte hain….

Flowers turns to fruit,

But –

Fruit cann’t turn to flower.

Just think –

Friendship may turn to love,

But –

Love cann’t turn to friendship…….

Story of every Student : -

Ummido wali dhup,

Sunshine wali aasha,

Padhne ki wajah kaam hai,

And –

Sone ke bahane jyada……

When you do something for your loved one ,

Its not showing them –       

How much you love.

Its about satisfying yourself that –

Yes you made them special ….

Mantra : - ye road humne banwaya hai. Ye road hai sabse juda.

Santa : - pahle nazar utha kar to dekho,

Tu naa jaane aas paas hai khuda……

Mistakes are painful,

When they happen, but –

Years later –

The collection of mistakes is called “Experince”,

Which leads you to Success……

Chand bhi jamin per aayega,

Sitaron ka gift aapko de jaayega,

Milegi itni khushi aapko ek din,

Ki –

Khuda bhi khushi udhar lene aapke paas aayega……

Apne dimag se sahi sawal puchhoge to –

Sahi jawab paoge,

Agar galat sawal puchhoge to –

Galat jawab paoge.

Dhairya kadwa ho sakta hai,

Lekin uska fal mitha hi hota hai…..

Taqdir ke khel se niras nahin hote,

Zindgi me kabhi udas nahin hote,

Hathon ki lakiron per yakin mat karna,

Taqdir to unki bhi hoti hai,

Jinke hath nahin hote….

Take risk,

If you win.        

You will be happy;

If you loose,

You will be wise…..

Jana kahan tha aur kahan aa gaye,

Duniya me banker mehman aa gaye,

Abhi to zindgi ki kitab kholi hi thi,

Aur naa jaane kitne imtehaan aa gaye…..

Old story –

Slow & steady win the race.

But in todays world, -

Tortoise fails & rabbit wins.

Get up & start running….

Santa ko Airtel me job mili.

Customer : mera Airtel sim lock ho gaya hai.

Santa : don’t   worry, Airtel sim nikal do, and BSNL sim lagado. Thanx for calling…..

Me ek gunah har bar karta hun.

Har sajde me use hi yaad karta hun.

Aye Khuda agar wo bani hi nahin mere liye.

To me use itna pyaar kyon karta hun….

3 Golden Rules from Vivekanand : -

1)      Who is helping you, don’t  forget them.

2)      Who is loving you, don’t   hate them.

3)      Who is believing you, don’t  cheat them….

Dard ki bazaar bhari padi hai,

Wo cheez na lo, jo ander se jail padi hai;

Wafa ki talash chhod do,

Ye duniya bewafai se bhari padi hai….

Dard-e-gham mohabbat se cee lena,

Sukoon ka jam samajh ke pee lena,

Zindgi me koi gile sikve na rakhna,

Bas mere bina khushi se jee lena….

                                                                           

Santa : whats the name of your Car?

Lady : forget, but it starts from “T”.

Santa : oye, teri. Tea per chalti hai. Humari gaddi to Petrol per chalti hai…

Lehron me unka naam likh naa paaye,

Taqdeer se hum unse jud naa paaye,

Ye sila mila chahat ka,

Ki –                        

Wafa karke bhi ,

Wafa ke haqdar ban naa paaye….

Kisi ne Santa se puchha : aap bade hain, phir bhi neeche kyon baithte ho?

Santa : neeche baithne wala kabhi girta nahin….

Pyaar me Mout se darta kaun hai,

Pyaar ho jata hai, karta kaun hai;

Hum to kar de pyaar me jaan bhi kurwan,

Per pata to chale ki humse pyaar karta kaun hai….

No one in Life will think exactly,

Like the way you think.

So –

Learn to appreciate all the difference.

And –

Understand each other…..

Santa and Banta 8^th me aathvi bar fail ho gaye.

Santa : chal suicide kar le.

Banta : oye, pagal ho gaya hai. Agale janam fir Nursery to hi suru karna padega…..

Thak gaya me tujhko yaad karte karte,

Ab me tujhe yaad aana chahta hun,

Aakhiri hichki teri baahon me aaye,

Mout bhi me shayarana chahta hun…..

Flowers kabhi do baar nahin khilte,

Janm kabhi do baar nahin milte,

Milte hain log hazaron,

Magar –

Magar hazaron galtiyan maaf karne wale “MAA-BAAP” nahin milte….

No one can bring us down from where God Has Kept us.

And –

No one can promote us to a place God has not designed for us…

Santa ghar ka darwaja ukhad kar kandhe pe leke jaa raha tha.

Kisi ne puchha : - oye kahan chale?

Santa : - lock khulbane….

Yaadon ne aakar kuchh yun gunguna diya,

Jaise kisi ne bhula hua fasana suna diya,

Jaane kya baat thi us guzre kal me,

Aankhein royi, magar chehra muskura diya…

Wajud naa ho to hasti kis kaam ki,

Maza naa ho to masti kis kaam ki,

Yaad aapki aaye aur hum SMS naa karein,

To fir ye dosti kis kaam ki…..

When you sit alone,

You sit more with the Past,

The Past comes as Slideshow,

And –

Ends in either Smile on lips,

Or tears in Eyes…

Apne hone ka ek ishara de dena,

Kabhi guzarun to salam ka jawab de dena,

Yaad aa jaun ibadat me agar,

To hath utha kar is gunahgar ke liye dua maang lena…..

Jab aapko uparwale ne banaya hoga,

Tab usko bhi bahut maza aaya hoga,

Hasi di bachchon wali,

Surat di bholi bhali,

Mizaz diya cool,

And dimag gaya bhool….

Kisi ne sach kaha hai ki –

Tum jise sabse jyada chaho,

Usko kabhi mat aazmana,

Kyunki agar wo gunahgar nikala,

Tab bhi dil tumhara hi tutega…

An Airoplane is always safe at ground,

But it’s not made for that.

So always take some meaningful risks in life,

To get a great achievement….

3 kaale dost the.

Ek bar bhagwan ne unse ek-ek vardan mangane ko kaha.

1^st and 2^nd ne kaha : - “hume gora bana do.”

3^rd ne haste hue kaha : - “inhe fir se kala bana do.”….

Hum gaye the unke ghar,

Kehna tha dil se dil mila lo,

Unki maa ne khola darwaza,

To hum ghabra ke bole : - “ agar koi bacha ho to Polio Drops pilwa lo.”

 "a person is known as a successful person , when their friends , relatives & known people etc are also achieved a success at that time in their life."

Love is such a marvelous word,

If boy understands, girl doesn’t  ;

If girl understands, boy doesn’t  ;

If both understand, world doesn’t ….

1 bar dairy milk ne kitkat se kaha : kya duniya me humare siwa koi sweet hai?

Kitkat ne kaha : sayad tum nahin jante, ye jo SMS padh rahe hain, wo humse bhi sweet hain…..

Maa : tu 18 saal ki ladki dekh kar  shadi kar le.

Santa : 2 biwi ghar lekar aata hai.

Maa : ye kya hai?

Santa : 18 ki mili nahin to me 9-9 ki 2 se shadi karli….

Me tod leta, agar wo Gulab hoti,

Me Jawab banta, agar wo sawal hoti,

Sab jante hain, me nasa nahin karta,

Phir bhi pee leta, agar wo sharab hoti…..

Mashoor hona, per magrur naa hona,

Kaamyabi ke liye kabhi chur naa hona,

Mil jayegi aapko sari kaynat yahin per,

Magar iske liye kabhi apno se door mat hona…

On the shore of life,

All good relations are like waves,

They come and go,

But –

They touch in such a way,

That a feeling of closeness remains forever……

Doctor : khansi ka kya haal hai?

Santa : khansi to band ho gayi. Par ab sans ruk-ruk ke aati hai.

Doctor : fikar naa karo, rab ne chaha to wo bhi band ho jayega….

Most time we think only some people in our life are special for us.

But –

It hurts when we realize that we are in a list of many for those special ones….

Saz gayi hai zindgi tumhari,

Ab kahan yaad ayegi humari,

Tum auron ke mahfil me shamil ho gayi,

Hum yahan tanha rahon me akele kho gaye…

Santa : aap mujhe school kyon bhejti hain?

Maa : taki tum ek achche insane ban sako.

Santa : lekin teacher to mujhe hamesha  murga banati hain…..

1 din khuda ne mujhse sawal kiya : dost ka sath kab tak chahta hai?

Maine ek aansu samunder me girakar kaha : jab tak tum is aansu ko dhundh nahi pate…..

Santa ki girlfriend ka message aaya –

‘I Miss You.’

Santa ne jawab bheja –

‘I Mister You.’….

Being yourself is what makes you attractive,

Being something you are not makes you are liar,

And –

Relationship build on lies don’t last…..

Santa : Yaar ‘I Love You’ bolne ka sabse achha din koun sa hota hai?

Banta : 1 April ,ladki fasi to cool; nahin to April Fool….

Ladka girlfriend ke sath park me 1 tree ke niche betha tha.

Old man : bête , kya ye humari sanskriti hai?

Ladka : nahi baba, ye bajuwale ghar ki aarti hai…..

One rupee coin always makes sound.

But –

Thousand rupees note is always silent .

That means –

When you are silent your value increases…..

Girl : mera dil mobile hai aur aap uske SIM.

Boy : me bahut khush hun.

Girl : jyada khush mat ho.

Boy : kyon?

Girl : kyonki mobile dual sim ka hai…

Sirf do kadam door per kinara hoga,

Socho kitna khubshurat ye nazara hoga,

Bas dil jo kahe use dil se karna,

Fir dekhna jo sochoge wo tumhara hoga…..

Manzil unhi ko milti hai,

Jinke sapno me jaan hoti hai,

Pankho se kuchh nahin hota,

Mere dost hauslon me udaan hoti hai….

Dil ka chain chura le gayi koi,

Aankhon se neend udaa le gayi koi,

Intezar ki aadat nahi thi hume,

Per intezar karna seekha gayi koi….

Khushi to har koi chahta hai,

Per khushnasib hi khushi ko pata hai,

Lekin har wo sakhs khushnasib ho jata hai,

Jise aap jaisa dost mil jata hai……

Jise chaha kash wo humari hoti,

Khwaish ka bhi koi kinara hota,

Ye soch kar me usko roka nahin,

Door hai ye kyon jatata,

Agar wo humari hoti….

My blood is not costly,

It is very cheap.

But –

My heart is very very costly.

Because –

Its full of –

YOU……

Toota jo dil to dukh hota hai,

Kar ke usko pyaar dil ab bhi rota hai,

Dard ka ehsaas hota hai usi ko,

Jo mohabbat pane ke baad khota hai….

Nothing is Prewritten,

And –

Nothing can be Re-written.

So write carefully.

Live the best and leave the rest…..

Pyaar naa karna ho to dil ko naa lagana,

Chain khokar khud ko naa rulana,

Kuch logo ne pyaar ko badnam kiya,

Kyon karte hain pyaar,

Jab aata nahin nibhana….

Santa : shadi kya hai?

Banta : shadi chewing gum hai. Jo suru me mithi lagti hai. Fir kitna bhi chabayiye, beswad hi lagegi….

Hum bhool jaye usko aisi hasrat kahan,

Wo yaad kare hume usko fursat kahan,

Jinke charon taraf ho apno ka sath,

Unko ab humari jaroorat kahan…

Naa baton me batati ho tum,

Naa chehre per dikhati ho tum,

Khushboo ki tarah bikharta hai pyaar,

Fir bhi pyaar ko chhupati ho tum…..

This LOVE is LOVE the

LOVE best

LOVE  way LOVE to LOVE

Say LOVE

You LOVE that LOVE I LOVE

Miss

LOVE you LOVE.

Read it again without word LOVE……

Har shakhs ko diwana bana deta hun,

Mili nazar to fasana bana deta hun,

Dil ke mariz ho to kar lo dosti mujhse,

Har dil ko dhadakana sikha deta hun….

SMILE –

Is not a single word.

It is a beautiful sentence.

S – Speak,

M – More,

I – In,

L – Less,

E – Energy.

So always keep SMILE…

Itni nafarat naa karo ki bikhar jaye hum,

Thoda gussa karo ki sudhar jaaye hum,

Ho jaye khata to ho jana khafa,

Magar itna bhi nahin ki mar jaaye hum…

Couple date per tha.

Mummy ne dekh liya.

Mummy ne call kiya : beta kahan ho?

Beta : paper dene aaya hun.

Mummy : dhyan se , paper ka result aaya to jaan se maar dungi…

Yaadon me naa dhundho hume,

Man me hum bas jaayenge,

Tamanna ho agar milne ki,

To hath rekhna apne sine per,

Hum dhadkano me hi mil jaayenge…

Wife : look at that drunker.

Husband : who is he?

Wife : 10 years back, he proposed me & I rejected him.

Husband : oh my God, he’s still celebrating…

Waqt ki rafter ruk gayi hoti,

Sharam se aankhein jhuk gayi hoti,

Agar dard janti shama parwane ka,

To jalne se pehle hi wo bhuj gayi hoti…

Ek baat bata do,

Rasta wo mujhe bhi dikha do,

Apni yaadon se chhutkara bhi dila do,

Bhule ho jaise mujhe tum,

Tarika wo mujhe bhi sikha do…..

English teacher : who killed the cat? Begins this sentence with by.

Santa : by the way who killed the cat?....

                                                                  

Kyon mere dard se tum bechain hoti ho,

Aankho se keemati moti baha deti ho,

Agar pyaar karti ho to –

Fir kyon mujhse door-door rehti ho….

Dil me aapke jazbat aate hain,

Hum aapke khyalon me kho jate hain,

Aap aate nahin khwabo me,

Isliye –

Aapki yaadon ko sine se laga kar so jate hain…

Kitna surur raat ki tanhayiyon me tha,

Chup tha chand jaise,

Ruswayiyon me tha,

Log jag rahe the apni ibadat ke liye,

Aur dil teri yaad ki gahrayiyon me tha….

Santa : hum itne garib hai ki humare paas 1 dog bhi nahin hai.

Banta : haa yaar. Raat me chor aa jaye to hum dono me se kisi ek ko bhaunkana padta hai…

Mat gussa karo kisi par itna,

Ki waqt kef aisle per apko bhi afsos ho jaye,

Kal kya pata aap miss karein hume,

Aur  hum hamesha ke liye miss ho jaayein…